115 Revolutionary Road

‎”If being crazy means living life as if it matters, then I don’t mind being completely insane.” -Revolutionary Road

For the past few weeks, I kept running into Kate Winslet and Leonardo Dicaprio’s glorious film Revolutionary Road, while channel surfing. And I never get to start it. I always run into the middle part where April (Kate Winslet) says she’s pregnant and decides that abortion is the best solution blah blah blah. Frank (Leonardo Dicaprio) disagrees of course and boom, the screaming begins. The movie is actually heavy drama and centered on the life of married couple Frank and April. They’re a symbol of a picture-perfect couple for their neighbors in 115 Revolutionary Road. Problem is, they’re a far cry from a perfect couple. April wants to achieve her dream to be an actress in Paris while Frank hates his horrible and very boring  job. Still, the couple decides to just live their life normally even though they wanna strangle each other every chance they can get. I won’t give out all the details anymore, just the ending. So April and Frank had this tremendous fight and April storms out of the house. The next morning, the couple had a pleasant breakfast and tried to pretend that everything was alright. Frank left for work and April, hold your hearts now, decided to abort her baby and performs “instillation abortion” (please don’t ask me what it is). The abortion goes wrong and April dies. Its terrible isn’t it?

But hey, don’t get me wrong. I LOVE the movie. I swear. I adore everything about it. The plot, the setting, the dialog,the characters  and of course, Leonardo Dicaprio. Kidding aside, what sparked my interest most is not just how hot Leo is in this movie (well okay maybe a little), rather its the story itself that caught me. How they manage to live a life they both despise so much and survive in a world that thinks they’re happy and perfect every damn second is what totally caught me. See Frank works in this corporate company or whatever it is that buys these huge machines and computers which are used in accounting and whatsoever. And I swear to you he hates it. But he thinks he doesn’t have much choice. He thinks its the only way his family can live comfortably and luxuriously. Frank does not really know what he wants to do. Its like he hasn’t found his passion yet. Its not that he isn’t good in his job, because he really is. In fact he was even promoted to a higher position. So, he’s a sort of successful man thanks to his stupid job.

And theres his wife, April who has big dreams but is unable to achieve them due to her husband’s refusal to move to Paris where April thinks she can fulfill her dreams. Frank thinks this is a pointless idea since they can be happy in 115 Revolutionary Road. They’ve got everything they want and need so he thinks Paris is only a childish dream. But is it? I mean, thats what he thinks. For himself, that is. How bout April? But because of the circumstances, with April being pregnant, Paris became totally out of the question. So theres no point in arguing anymore. Then as I’ve said earlier, April killed the baby and ended up killing herself too in the process. Yeah, I know what you’re thinking. So what in Merlin’s baggy pants is the point of this entire post?

Well, I only got 3 things for you which I realized after seeing this movie for who knows how many times I’ve seen and cried because of it. First is life is short, okay? Life is TOO short. You don’t have all the time in the world you know? None of us do. Life is short so go ahead and do whatever you wanna do. Don’t spend your life sulking around the corner saying life is unfair. Stop thinking “why can’t I do what I wanna do?  why is it that nobody cares?” Like April, whose being this drama queen who goes screaming at her husband because he doesn’t want to let her go and explore the world. You know what, no one’s actually trying to stop you from doing anything except yourself. Sometimes, its just us who makes us feel down ourselves. Go do the things you think will make you happy. Don’t go on doing stuff you don’t wanna do in the first place like Frank. Don’t say you don’t have a choice because you do have. In the end, its still freewill that will take you places. Its still down to your own thinking and your own choices. Second, don’t go running away from your responsibilities. April probably thought that her whole world is crumbling in front of her already and that theres nothing else to do other than to die. Don’t think that just because you escaped from something you don’t want to happen will make you brave or heroic. Actually, it will make you look cowardly. Escaping is never an option. Go ahead and face it. Because at some point in your life, whatever it is that you ran away from will come back for you.

Well, I think thats all. Aside from the fact that I’m kind of sleepy already I think I made my point pretty clear. Look, I’m not like being preachy or something here. I just want to share whatever it is that I’m thinking besides, thats the whole point of blogging right? So whether you agree or not I don’t care. Well okay, maybe a little. (Haha!) But other than that, I just wish you’d pause for a second and try to ponder what I’d typed in this post, okay? Thats all. Hope you guys get it.

Oh, before I forgot. I said I got 3 things for you right? And I only mentioned 2. So heres the third and last one. After seeing the movie, I gotta ask you this. How can Leonardo Dicaprio still be as freaking hot as he was 13 years ago when he starred in Titanic? I mean, seriously.


Source: http://www.filmcritic.com/features/2009/02/henry-fernaine-interview/






Birthday special :)

January 4, 2006, exactly five years ago, a wonder child was born. She who would change the course of my existence.


Her name is Jannah Angelou and yes, she’s an angel. When she’s asleep, that is. Haha just kidding! Anyway, she turns five today but for me, its like she’s living for 50 years already. With her star-studded confidence, her versatility (she can dance, sing and act) and her unique talent of pretending the supernatural to happen. And because its her special day today, lemme tell you the top three moments I had with her.

3.  The moment she blamed me for farting when it was really her

Okay, this probably sounds embarrassing. Oh, wait it really is. This happened like ages ago and I still remember it until now. We were sitting down in our lolo’s bedroom in our old Sampaloc house. It was already evening that time and the two of us, Jannah and I, were the only ones inside that room. So we were just sitting down doing nothing when all of a sudden she farted. I looked at her and I laughed. I asked her who farted. You know what I got for an answer? She said in a very straight face and very seriously, “Si Coleen ata”. I thought I could die right then and there.


2. When she fell head over heels with my friend during my 14th birthday party

See, I have this super cute friend named Reymarc. I gotta tell you, he is REALLY cute. Like gummy bear cute. So, it was my 14th birthday party and we were having it at home. The whole Rillon family was there (except for Ninong Jon boohoo!) so obviously, Jannah was there. Since its my birthday, I invited some of my friends and as I was saying, Reymarc came. He was playing basketball with a few of my other guests and being her boyish self, Jannah played with him too. I don’t know what happened exactly but the next minute, Jannah was crying and shouting not-so-nice things to Reymarc. So they had a mini fight yadda yadda. Jannah was furious and Reymarc kept on apologizing again and again. Moments later, Jannah was nicey nicey already to Reymarc. And after a little while, tadaaa, she annonuced that yes indeed, she now has a major crush on Reymarc. She even picked the little flower candies on my cake and offered it to her major crush. Ah, young love.


Jannah and Reymarc =)

1. The day she first called me Pledo

This is, hands down,  the most memorable moment I had with my darling cousin. This memory is the beginning of all the stunning memories I had with her. It was an ordinary summer day and they were vacationing at our house. Jannah and I were the only ones downstairs and I swear, it was kind of awkward  ‘cuz we didn’t know each other. Haha! Honestly, we don’t. I just see her as one of my cutie patootie cousins. I have no idea how extraordinary she’d be.  So as I was saying, we were at home doing nothing and I was tasked to keep watch over her cuz she might do something horrendous or who-knows-what sort of things. I was getting bored. WE were getting bored. Simply put, we were bored with each other’s company. Then all of a sudden she leapt up and said, “ate Coleen habulin mo ko!”. What the heck, I thought. But I did anyway. We ran in circles and the next thing I knew we were laughing so hard. But thats not the end of it. During that time, the Dyezebel-and-Fredo tandem was getting hot on the entertainment biz. And of course, my little cousin was hooked to it. So my wee cousin became Dyezebel and I became Fredo and in an instant our living room became the setting of GMA’s hot drama series. But because Jannah’s only in an age where most people speak “bulol language”, she pronounced “Fredo” as “Pledo”. So there you go then. I became the world famous Pledo and the rest is history.




There are millions more I want to add in my list (but because I’m a lazy person I cut it down to three) like how we’d always have this mini pictorials and she’d always have the most daring poses and ideas. Or that time when I’d be putting on lipgloss and she and Angelica (her sister), would be running to me and ask me to put some on their delicate little lips. I’d also remember how she loves to sing and perform for everybody’s delight. Then theres that little fact that she’s my mum’s only niece who calls her “Tita Jewel Ann”.  See, every bit of her is delightful. And I can just shout to the universe how lucky I am to have her as my dear cousin even though sometimes, we pissed each other off. Haha! But yeah, theres no one like this 5 year old creature who can put a smile on my face, well  okay, maybe if you’re a really cute guy named David Archuleta, but still. 🙂


Busy much? o.O



Taddaa! She drew me!


Peace brother!

Happy birthday Dear Jannah! Ate Pledo loves and misses you so much! =)




Hospital Sleepover :)

I’m starting this post without any specific topic in mind. Its an ordinary weekend. I am alone except for the television blaring tonight’s PBA game: Talk N Text vs San Miguel. Nothing extraordinary has happened for the past couple of days. Unless you count the time my grandfather was sent to the hospital because he complained of chest pains. Turns out, something in his heart shoot up again which needs to be cured immediately. I’m not sure of the specific name of his ailment. All I know is that its really dangerous for his health. I wouldn’t call that extraordinary. More of sad and terrifying. Y’know what I mean? Anyway, because of that I skipped class to spend time in the hospital. I didn’t actually took care of my grandfather. It was more of, I dunno. Kept them company? Since I’m not really good in taking c are of people (except for Philip ‘cuz he’s more like a kindergarten pupil and I’m his guardian). So, I spend the entire day in the hospital doing,um,nothing. Well, not really nothing. I sort of explored the whole hospital. I sat on every available chair and read each and every book I packed with me. I listened to all the songs in my phone and I ate everything given to me (except for the hotdog sandwich). Yeah, you can call it a productive day.

But I gotta tell you, spending the entire day in the hospital is NOT boring. Instead, its very DEPRESSING. I repeat, depressing. You see patients all around you: coughing, drinking their medicines,  making who-knows-what-kind of sounds. You just can’t ignore them. Believe me, I tried. I spent most of my time outside the ward because being alone is less depressing than seeing people suffer. But when you’re loitering in the hallways, you see people sitting down and crying (probably waiting for the the doctor’s verdict or something). I am not even kidding. It was all so sad. It was like dementors appeared and sucked all the happiness in the air. And you can’t do anything about it other than put on your headphones, tune in to the highest volume and shut your eyes to keep yourself from crying. But even that won’t keep you away from misery.

Anyway, I won’t go on narrating everything I saw that day because you might start tearing up or something. Plus, I’m guessing that its so depressing already. On the lighter note, lemme tell you about this one patient I got the very chance of meeting.

So theres this really tall guy whose one of my grandfaher’s “ward-mates”. He looked kindda scary with his deep eyes, huge frame, very dark eyebags (when did eyebags got light anyway?) and huge hands. Okay, he was really scary. He looked really intimidating and he had this dark sinister stare. But I can see that he was really lonely. The kind of people you’d wanna give a teddy bear or even a balloon. So heres what happened. I was loitering on the hallway just outside the ward and the door was left open. When suddenly, “scary-man” peeked through the curtains and stared right at me. I literally froze. Then, in less than a second, he went behind the curtain hiding himself. I didn’t know if I was freaked out or amused. But I just sat there and waited for him to peek again. A little while, he peeked again and this time I was ready. I gave him a small smile which I’m sure made me look really silly. With that, he hid again. I didn’t know if he was surprised. Maybe he got scared of me. Oh well, who knows?

So there you go. I just wanted to share my little experience spending a day in a hospital and “interacting” with a patient. Thankfully, my grandfather was able to go home today. No more hospital sleepovers for moi! Not that I didn’t enjoy it, because I did. Its just that, who wants to get sick and camp out in a hospital, right? 😉

P.S. Due to the “whole-day-at-the-hospital” experience, I found out that I’m not scared of sick patients and all that. Unfortunately, I am now scared of elevators and other confined spaces. So much for being brave. 🙂


2011 is all about YOU.

Its exactly 5 hours before midnight. 5 hours to kiss and show our love for the year that had passed. Thank you 2010 for I learned LOADS from you! And I mean it:) You taught me to have fun without any regrets. To be myself every single minute of my life. You also taught me that there are moments wherein we have to be brave even though we’re really not. That there are times when crying is the best remedy to any problem but of course chocolate cake and a good movie (particularly Fame) will also be okay. That a John Lloyd movie is really WORTH skipping class (especially when you’re with your pretty friend whose such a John Lloyd fanatic, right Aubrey? =D ). To appreciate every single thing someone would do for you because even for a single minute in their lives, they thought of you. And most importantly you made me realize that you will never ever know what you have until its gone. ‘Cuz once its gone, well, so are you. Or if you’re still here, then you’re probably not as complete as you were before.

But this post is not just looking back at the previous year. Its also how I’d embrace the year to come. I only have one principle about the upcoming year and here’s what it is. New year isn’t about becoming a NEW YOU. Its not about leaving everything behind; your flaws, your mistakes. Instead, its all about embracing yourself. And that includes your imperfections and whatever it is you don’t like or rather, what people don’t like about you. Because your flaws, your achievements, your looks (even that scar you’ve been wishing to disappear all year) they make up who you are. And whats the best way to “change” yourself for the better than just by being yourself? Just like what Avril Lavigne said “I’m the best damn thing that your eyes have ever seen.”

There you go then. Goodbye 2010 hello 2011:) Honestly, I still can’t get over the year 2010. It seems like I can’t say farewell yet. There are just lots of tears,laughter and memories that happened. But life goes on. Time goes on. Whichever way you want. All I know is that there are billions of lessons from 2010 and I swear to you, they won’t fit here. If I could stretch them side by side, they would reach forever. Seriously.

Photo Source: http://www.google.com.ph/imglanding?q=2011+year+of+the+rabbit



Getting wasted and liking it.

Finally, hello Christmas! Hello to you and to all the calories I consumed because of your existence. But never mind that now. I know everyone is busy celebrating and getting wasted. Okay, maybe I’m a part of the “wasted” group of people right now. Not the “getting drunk and throwing up all over my parents’ carpet” kind  but the “sitting on the couch next to my cousins whose idea of celebrating Christmas is playing Guitar Hero”  kind of wasted. Wasted because I am literally WASTING precious time. Instead of doing something productive like, say pigging out more, I’m sitting VERY lazily beside my guy cousins who are “making music” on a toy guitar. I know most people would probably shout at us to get moving and, I don’t know, um, bond with each other? But heck, they are enjoying and I also enjoy their silent company. Who wouldn’t?  Well, try to picture it. 4 kids (I’m not sure though about the other one ‘cuz I think he’s 18?) lounging around doing their own thing without anyone trying to get on their nerves. That is just pure heaven.

Honestly, I have no idea why I suddenly had the urge to post another blog. I don’t know. Maybe because I’m bored? But I’m not really bored I kind of like it here actually. Or just random stuff again? Well who cares, right? At least I’m not getting wasted any longer. Kind of.

Peace out :p

(Note: On second thought, my guy cousins are NOT really wasting their time on this Guitar Hero thing. They’re actually kindda good. Okay, REALLY good. Why shouldn’t they be? Being good at everything runs in the family 😛 )

A 14 yr old’s Letter to Santa Claus

Hi Santa :p

In my entire 14 years of living, I still have no idea if you exist or not. Surely, everybody thinks you’re just some sort of fictional character. I mean, who would blame us? A fat guy in a red suit that only pops during Christmas to deliver gifts for the kiddos? Humor me Santa but I’m still having second thoughts if you’re real or not.

But thats not the point. I’m not here to bully you or trash-talk with you. Not now. Theres plenty of time for that. I’m not here to ask for gifts either. I’m writing you a letter to ask some questions thats been bugging my mind since the very first time I heard of your existence. So, if you don’t mind I might as well begin.

They said you live in North Pole with your wife Mrs. Claus (who looks exactly like you but with curls) and the hundred elves you torture into making presents. Obviously, North Pole is freezing cold anytime of the year right? Well then how do you survive? No offense meant, but based on the “Santas” who impersonate you in Department Stores you’re kindda old. Okay, REALLY old. So, how do you survive? Don’t you have arthritis? Its freezing up there where you live. You’re lucky you’re not strapped in a wheelchair. Your medicines must be very effective since, well, you’re still alive despite the weather and you still find time to deliver gifts every year right? And for me that is beyond cool. Cheers to your doctor Santa!

Next question is about your very famous Naughty and Nice list. How accurate is it? There are a billion people in the world and lets say half of it are children. How do you keep up? And how come I only hear children associated with you? Why not grown ups? Grandparents? Hmm..I smell favoritism here. You better be careful St. Nick! 😛

About the reindeer. First and foremost, why a reindeer? Bears would be cuter. You can even have a variety of them. Polar bears in front, grizzly bears in the middle and pandas at the back. But I doubt if they could still hover in the air with their weight. Bears are huge, right? But why not give it a shot? Times are changing sir. People get bored easily seeing the same stuff again and again. And in relation to that, why use animals? I know they look magical flying in the air but we see the same stuff every year. Why not use a flying Ford Anglia like Harry Potter or better, use an airplane next year! Although I can’t imagine you landing in the rooftops anymore.

Okay Santa I know you’ve got to deliver presents for the entire universe tonight and even though I got a billion more questions for you, I’ll save them all for next time. So, heres my last and most important question for you: Am I in the nice list this year?

Love always,

Andy :p


Why is Rudolph’s nose red??? And does it really glow in the dark? 😕


Do you really get stuck on chimneys or is that fiction?


Wait a minute, are you even real?!?



Things to do when Rain says Aloha :)

I love rain. The feeling of  your clothes sticking to your body, the smell of damp soil, the grayish color of the sky.  I devour the moments when rain just pours unexpectedly and you hear the thudding of raindrops in the roof. Everything is pleasing to the senses. My senses, at least.

Rain makes me want to go back to bed. Curl up with a good book. Eat gallons and gallons of Double Dutch-flavored ice cream while watching episode after episode of the Twilight Zone. Lets face it, rain makes me feel lazy. Rain makes me want to procrastinate. It shouts at me to stop whatever I’m doing and just lie down. And for that, I seriously wanna punch him in the face.

So what do I do during rainy days? Heres my “things-to-do-not-only-during-rainy-days-but-also-during-days-that-suck” list (WARNING: This list contains stuff I usually do and would probably make you feel more down. But heck, I enjoy doing these things so its your choice if you wanna follow my lead :p )

1. I curl up with a good book – Any book is fine but mostly tear-jerker ones like My Sister’s Keeper or Charlie St. Cloud. Rain lets you feel more the depth and sadness of the story that in a few minutes time you’re already begging for a box of tissue.

2. Listen to music – Alternative and rock is good 🙂 I highly recommend Coldplay, The Script, Lifehouse, Owl City, Snow Patrol, FM Static and probably a bit of Boys Like Girls.

3. Eat. Pig Out – What to eat when the weather is cold? Ice cream of course! But if you’re a highly sensible person than I am then you’d eat hot stuff like, I dunno soup? Or champorado. But I don’t want my champorado hot. I’d place it in the fridge first then eat it after a few hours. SERIOUSLY.

4. Watch something kick-ass – By “kick-ass” I mean “Twilight Zone” or The Addams Family. Twilight Zone ‘cuz its so sci-fi and absolutely brain-wracking. Nice exercise for the brain after you’ve pigged out and lounge around the house all day. The Addams Family because they’re absolutely ridiculous and their funny antics won’t make you feel bored. Plus I love how their family is so goth and morbid. Haha! Honestly,those are the only shows I could watch again and again (Okay, maybe even the Powerpuff Girls). I know those shows don’t air anymore on TV but thank heavens for the Internet and Youtube, now I could watch them as long as I want to (wow, I sound like a cheesy TV advertisement). Well, you get the idea.

5. Surf the Net – What? I’m running out of ideas. Plus, what else do people do nowadays?

Theres my list. Hope you can use it once in a while. I know I may not be the best advice giver in the world but if you don’t have anything to do when its pouring outside then why not use my list? Besides, nothing will be lost. In fact, you’ll probably gain more. Weight that is :p

BTW, just another random picture. I think I took this picture somewhere in Manila or Makati. The quote inserted there is a line from my favorite poem “The Rainy Day” by Henry Longfellow

Random Thoughts of the Gothic Sweetheart: The Origin

Okaaaaay, now I’m ready =)

Hello there! Wait,that sounds really cheesy. Um,oh whatever. ‘Sup?

See, its my first time to do this “blog” thing and I still haven’t gotten the hang of this “technological” activity. So, I’m deeply sorry. =)

You might be wondering where I got the not-so-long title of my blog, “Random Thoughts of the Gothic Sweetheart”. Random thoughts, because, well its random. You know, the kind which pops in your mind unexpectedly and you just have to jot it down even though you have no idea why. That happens to me often so there you go. The Gothic Sweetheart part, well thats a different story and if you’re interested I can tell you about it. 🙂

Goth yet sweet :")

Honestly, I’m not most girls my age. I’m very interested in sports, astronomy, literature and gothic culture. I’m not a creep or anything. I just don’t find enjoyment in watching stuff like Gossip Girl (but I love Britain’s Next Top Model!) or obsessing over Korean guys who grew popular with their songs even a single line I can’t comprehend. I’m not saying I’m against them. Thats just the type of stuff my friends are interested in and which I don’t give a care about.

See, I’m kindda different. I’m not a loner or a weirdo (okay maybe a dork or a nerd) but I’m not average either. I grew up thinking about things like death,superficiality and why Kobe Bryant is such a hell of an athlete. I also grew up with my friends watching Phineas and Ferb while I watched the NBA, my friends reading Twilight while I read The Time Travelers Wife. Well, you get the picture.Thats why I used the word “goth”(aside from the fact that I really am quite, a bit goth).In the present time,whether you admit it or not,once people used the “G” word to describe somebody its a  given that the person being described is out-of-this-world or in most cases, creepy.  And since I’m sort-of different from most people, call me GOTH then. =)

Thats not all though. How about the sweetheart part, you ask? Lets put it this way. Remember what I said about me being interested in sports? Yes I absolutely LOVE sports particularly basketball (as a matter of fact, I am watching a PBA game right now Meralco vs Rain Or Shine :p ). But sometimes I watch the game more of desire to see hot cagers. HAHA! Awkward! But unfortunately I do that especially during Ginebra games. Haha! So whats my point here? Just the fact that even though I’m a wee bit different from other people, deep inside me I’m still an ordinary 14-year old girl whose dream in life is to finish my studies and finally part with my terror highschool teachers. Erase the dream part I’ll be fine anywhere as long as I gotta be a courtside reporter or a disk jock someday. Haha! Just kidding:) But as I’ve said if you dig 5000 ft deep through me and you push away all my blood vessels and whatever stuff you find inside me, a more normal and ordinary version of me lies there. Or as what I call it, a dear little SWEETHEART still lies inside despite everything else. =”)

So,there you go. The origins of the title of my blog. Goth,sweetheart whatever. I’m still me, love.